This blog post is gonna be different from all my other ones. Because this one’s way too personal and it isn’t just a write up, but more like a tribute or an appreciation post to the woman I love, my queen elizabeth. Might be cringe and cliché and all the other things that can possibly be told about a Karan johar, Vineeth Sreenivasan movie, but I’m gonna do it anyway, cos she has done a lot more for me. So, trigger warning, if you are allergic to a tad bit of mushy romance, I suggest, you read my previous blog posts or wait for the next one, soooooo…… here goes….

It all started in a classroom I didn’t even want to be in. A CA class yes, that same soul-numbing, spirit-crushing, number-worshipping environment most of us enroll in because someone somewhere said it’s a “stable career.” I didn’t sign up out of passion. I signed up because I had to. This class was nothing different, the same old boring lectures about how you could use rules to break rules and earn money at the cost of your clients. Although earning money seemed interesting, the process it involved was too boring to pay attention to. I was only plotting to somehow bunk these classes and do something I like, and there she walked in like an angel disguised in a human form. I was so sure that she was an angel because I could see the whole class light up with her entry.

Now, I won’t go full Bollywood and say time slowed or violins started playing in the background. No. But I did look up from the last page of my notebook, where you could see the history of all the tic-tac-toe games I had played since the inception of the classes, and I remember thinking, okay, I might come back tomorrow.

From there, everything unfolded. Slowly. Sweetly. Stupidly, at times. But it grew. And before I knew it, her presence was not just part of my day, it was the day. The calls, the texts, the long rants about absolutely nothing. The tiny fights, the dramatic exits, the even more dramatic re-entries. The first time she held my hand. The way she said my name when she was mad. The way she said my name when she wasn’t.

Well, a lot of things she did made me fall for her. But my favorite thing about her was her Laughter. Loud. Unfiltered. The kind of laugh that doesn’t ask for permission. It was the first thing I fell for. Not her eyes, not her walk, not her notes, though they were disgustingly well-organized. It was her laugh, genuine and confident, like someone who knew exactly who she was and didn’t care if the world kept up.

Years later, I still remember that laugh. I’ve heard it in classrooms, in auto rides, over phone calls, through fights, in quiet moments, at weddings, at baptisms, at funerals, and in rooms where it didn’t belong but showed up anyway. It’s been the soundtrack to some of the most real and joyful parts of my life.

She didn’t just change the class for me, she redefined what a ‘presence’ meant. There was something about the way she occupied space. Confident, not arrogant. Clear-headed, never cold. Caring, but not clingy. She knew what she wanted, and somehow, in the middle of all that clarity, she made room for someone like me, a slightly disorganised, overly sarcastic, emotionally guarded idiot who never really planned for anything but started hoping for everything once she came in.

There’s something incredibly humbling about being loved by someone like her.

She made it look effortless. The way she remembered small details. The way she looked out for people without making it obvious. The way she made space for opinions, for growth, for flaws, and for me.

We’ve had fights. Not the dramatic movie fights. The slow, quiet ones where you know the other person loves you, but you’re both just too tired or too human to say the right thing. And every time, she came back, not because she had to, but because she wanted to. That’s the thing about her. She doesn’t stay anywhere she doesn’t want to be. And she’s stayed with me…

Yes, there was a break. A real one.
The kind where silence is louder than shouting. Where days go by and you pretend it’s fine, but you know something inside you is missing.We were apart, not in miles, but in mindset.

But she, she handled it with so much maturity, it still humbles me. While I spiraled, she stood still. She didn’t chase, didn’t beg, and didn’t burn down the bridge. She waited. Not for us to return. But for clarity, to find us both.

And when it did, she didn’t say, “I told you so.” She just let love in again. Stronger. Softer. Wiser….

How long have we been together, you ask? Long enough to forget how it feels to not know her, but short enough that it still feels exciting when I see her name pop up on my phone. We’ve changed. We’ve grown. We’ve seen versions of each other that no one else ever will.

There’s something sacred and spiritual about growing up alongside the person you love. You watch them become softer in some places, sharper in others. You see them break and build again. You hold space for who they were and who they’re becoming, and you realize love isn’t always about fireworks. Sometimes, it’s just about staying. Showing up. Choosing them. Every day. Especially on the days when it’s hard.

People ask me, “How do you know she’s the one?”

I don’t always know how to answer. But maybe it’s this:

She’s the first person I want to tell when something good happens. And the only person I want to sit with when everything’s gone to hell.

I’ve loved her in crowded classrooms and in quiet silences.

I’ve loved her in chaos, in calm, in confusion.

And I will keep loving her, in all the versions of this life we live, loud, soft, messy, and ordinary.

Because here’s the truth:

No matter what happens,

No matter how old I am,

No matter what changes in the world,

I will always love her. And I will always be there for her.

It’s almost been a decade with her, and somehow, it still feels like I’m sitting in that classroom again, looking up, hearing her laugh, and thinking, God, I hope she stays.

Spoiler: She did.

And thank God for that.

So, here’s to us, to every laugh we’ve shared, every challenge we’ve conquered, every goofy selfie, every inside joke, and every moment of growth and love in between. I cherish it all, and I can’t wait to see what the next nine lives have in store for us.

No matter what happens, no matter how old I get, no matter what changes in the world, I will always love you and be there for you.

From your Ni.